


Running Towards Light

by Usami_chan13



Category: Sonic the Hedgehog (Video Games), Sonic the Hedgehog - All Media Types, Sonic the Hedgehog - Fandom
Genre: Gen, POV First Person, Post-Game(s)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-05-25
Updated: 2012-05-25
Packaged: 2017-11-05 23:54:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,488
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/412440
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Usami_chan13/pseuds/Usami_chan13
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>/post "Sonic Heroes"/ "The feeling of an unclear past, running towards an uncertain future.  What was worse about this was that these feelings, these uncertainties,  these doubts, these…fears…all of them are real. But I still might not be."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Running Towards Light

**Author's Note:**

> Shadow POV. This story takes place after the game _Sonic Heroes_ , because in that game Shadow doesn't remember much of his past.
> 
> One of my _really_ old stories that I'll probably be embarrassed and/or ashamed for posting later.

I didn’t care about the rain that was falling around me, even if it made the ground dangerously slick. I didn’t care that I didn’t know where I was going, or that I didn’t remember from whence I came. At the moment, I didn’t care much about anything except to keep running as fast as I could. And believe me, I can run pretty fast.

I enjoyed running because it was an easy escape from my problems. When I’m running, passing though an area at the speed of light, I don’t have to think about anything except to keep running, to keep going despite any weather conditions or hardships.

But I know that if I stop running, or even slow down a little, my problems will catch up to me, to return and haunt me.

I know that I’ll have to face this eventually. I can’t avoid it forever. Still, as long as I can try, I’ll keep going.

And yet, with a sigh, I skidded to a stop, which was a bit difficult on the wet ground. But I did stop eventually, right in front of a lake. Needing a small break from my sprinting, I walked over to the lake and peered to look at the surface.

Though the rain disturbed the top of the lake, I could just make out the reflection of the midnight hedgehog in the water, the blood red eyes staring back at nothing.

So many questions began to fill my mind, just as they had every other time. So many questions that I had no answers to, and ever some questions that I’ve already solved.

Ever since my awakening, I couldn’t remember anything about myself. If it wasn’t for Rouge, I wouldn’t even have remembered my name. Still, it made me wonder for a moment how she knew me, and where we met. Even then, she seemed familiar to me, but I didn’t understand how.

After she forced Omega and me to join her and become a team, I began to remember a little about myself. I remembered that I was Shadow the Hedgehog, and I was a quick runner, but not much after that. So I went along with the team thing since all three of us were after Eggman in one way or another. I wanted to find him to get some answers about myself; who I was, and why I was in Eggman’s base. I had to admit, I was a bit hesitant to work with one of Eggman’s robots, and I could tell Omega didn’t want to work with me either. Still, we both knew that getting Eggman was more important, so we were able to work with each other.

Being with Rouge helped me remember a little bit. She answered some of my questions, though not all of them. It wasn’t that she didn’t know them, because I could tell that she did. In her eyes, I could see the hesitancy when I asked her something, and the gratefulness when her attention was called away. I persisted, though, and I found a few answers. But it still wasn’t enough.

When I saw Sonic, something clicked in my mind, and there was something about him that was recognizable. It wasn’t only that he looked like me. There was something else there. I didn’t really think much of it until he made it clear that he knew me. And it wasn’t just him. The other two with him seemed to know me too. But I was still in the dark as to how they knew me and from where we met.

After we defeated the Eggman fake, and I saw the Shadow robot, I didn’t know what to think. Eggman’s words of me having no memories entered my head as I stared at the likeness of the broken robot. The possibility…that I wasn’t who I thought I was…became a nightmarish fantasy that plagued my mind. Did it mean…that I wasn’t the real Shadow? Was I just a copy of the real thing? Was I just…created?

It was then that I remember that I _was_ just created. The real Shadow – be it me or someone else – was never real to begin with. He – or I – was created by…someone…to be the ultimate life form, Shadow the Hedgehog.

But was _I_ the real Shadow, or wasn’t I? Even after defeating Metal Sonic, I was still in the dark about my past. I did remember, however, that Sonic and I…did something to save the world. When I saw him transform into Super Sonic, I remember being able to do something like that too. He and I saved the world. But from what? And why?

After the whole ordeal, I began traveling around and exploring, running to try and escape the darkness I was in, to escape what I didn’t know. Sometimes I returned and talked with some of the others. Tails always offered me a place to stay if I need one and was in his area. Having nowhere else to go, I’d stay with him sometimes and ask him questions about my past. Like Rouge, Tails sometimes hesitated when he answered, and he also couldn’t shed enough light for me.

Sonic, like myself, traveled a lot, so I hardly saw him when I returned to Station Square. In fact, I never saw him at all…anywhere…However, I would sometimes run into Amy or Rouge, and they’d let me stay with them, too. I’d never stay for very long, though, and I’d usually leave in the morning before they woke.

I was beginning to think of hiring Team Chaotix to try and help me discover my past. But I decided against it, seeing as I had no money, and they didn’t take kindly to free jobs.

So I was trapped. Was I ever going to find out who I really was? For what I was created for? Am I the real Shadow or not?

I finally tore my gaze away from the lake, slightly disgusted with myself for unknown reasons. Wanting to clear my head, I started to run again. I didn’t care that I could barely see anything around me because of the pouring rain. All I wanted to forget. I wanted to forget what I didn’t remember.

To escape from the dark hold of emptiness. The feeling of an unclear past, running towards an uncertain future. What was worse about this was that these feelings, these uncertainties, these doubts, these…fears…all of them are real. But I still might not be.

I suppose I should have been thinking things through, even if thinking wasn’t something I wanted to do. Still, because of the heavy rain, I couldn’t see anything, not even the cliff in front of me. By the time I did, I couldn’t stop in time because of the damp ground. I ran right off, and I was too far to get back to the cliff. There was nothing I could do except fall into the abyss below.

* * *

Slowly, my eyes opened, and I found myself looking up at the ceiling of a cave. Slightly surprised, I sat up. Outside the cave opening, I could see the pouring rain, and could barely make out a rock wall on the other side. Beside me was a fire, giving light to the otherwise dark cave. Where am I? How did I survive the fall?

“It’s about time you got up,” I heard a voice say behind me. “I thought you were going to sleep forever…”

The slight arrogant tone, mixed with the energy of a person who enjoyed having fun, was very familiar, and I had a good image of who was sitting behind me. Still, I turned around, and a pair of jade green eyes belonging to a certain blue hedgehog came into my view.

Seeing the small smile on his face, I couldn’t help but smile back. I don’t know when we had become “friends”, but perhaps it was when we saved the world together. I didn’t know and I didn’t care.

“So what are you doing here, Sonic?” I asked, turning to face him completely.

“Saving you, apparently,” he replied, that playful smirk on his face never going away. “What were you thinking?”

Even if he meant it as a joke, I looked away form him and stared into the fire. I couldn’t help but start thinking about what happened before I ran off the cliff, how I wanted to forget all the unanswered questions, how I wanted to forget everything I did and did not know.

Sonic must have noticed the change in me, for the smile on his face disappeared. He soon became serious, and I never thought I’d see him this way.

“I heard about what happened,” he said quietly, looking into the fire as well.

I let out a small, pained laugh. “Did Rouge tell you?”

“Actually, she told Knuckles, who told me.”

I nodded slightly, still watching as the light from the flames danced across the walls of the cave, creating dancing shadows across the ceiling. We were both quiet for a while as we listened to the rain pounding down on the cliffs around us.

As I watched the fire, I began to recall the time Sonic and I saved the world. We had both used the Chaos Control to transport – was it the ARK? – away from the Earth’s atmosphere, preventing it from crashing down. I remember falling……

“How much do you remember?” I barely heard Sonic ask, pulling my mind out of my thoughts.

I simply shrugged. “Some things,” I replied.

“What about Maria?”

I looked at him. “Maria?”

“Yeah,” he responded, looking at me. “Do you remember her?”

“I…” I couldn’t say that I did. Even if the name sounded familiar, I didn’t know exactly who she was. It felt, though, that she was someone important.

“I don’t know…” I finally answered.

He nodded, understandingly. Then, as though to lighten the mood, he asked, “So what have you been up to? I haven’t seen you since we defeated Metal Sonic.”

I shrugged again. “Nothing really. Just traveling around.”

“Yeah, I know whatcha mean. I can’t sit still for too long either.”

That was easy for me to believe. Sonic didn’t seem like the type to stay in one place for too long.

“Lucky you,” I found myself muttering.

My double blinked slightly. “How am I lucky?” he asked.

“You know enough about yourself to be sure of something like that…”

“Oh…we’re back to _that_ again…”

“Well, can you honestly blame me?” I demanded angrily. “Do you think it’s easy not knowing everything about yourself, or wondering if you’re real or not? Can you say that you know what it’s like?”

He shook his head.

“Exactly! You don’t know what it’s like, doubting your very existence, wondering why you were created, and for what purpose. You, at least, have a past, a complete past, to base your life from. I don’t. I don’t remember everything. I don’t know where I come from, what I’ve done, or even what I’m going to do now. I don’t know how to get back what I’ve lost, or even if I’ll ever get it back.”

Sonic sat silently for a moment, avoiding my eyes by looking into the fire again. Then, he said, “Maybe it would be best to just wait a while.”

Again, I was surprised. First of all, Sonic wouldn’t be on to tell someone to wait. I always saw him to be impatient. Second, what was waiting going to do?

“What do you mean?”

“Just as I said. Just wait a while. There’s nothing you can do to bring back your memory, so what can you do but wait?”

“But what if my memory never comes back?”

“If you’re meant to remember, you’ll remember. If you don’t, then you don’t. So you can just start over from what you _do_ remember.”

“That doesn’t solve my problem of if I’m real or not…”

“Again, all you have to do is wait and see what happens. You’ll find that answer eventually, won’t you?”

“I guess…”

“Right. But think about it…if you _do_ get all your memories back, and then find out that you’re not real, will your memories make it easier to accept that fact?”

I looked into the fire. Thinking of a scenario like that pained me slightly, because there was a possibility of that happening. I shook my head slightly. “No……my memories may only make it worse……”

“Exactly. So just be patient. You’ll get the answer you’ll need sooner or later.”

I laughed slightly. “Would _you_ be able to keep patience?”

He grinned. “Just do as I say, not as I do…”

I laughed again, leaning against the cave wall. “You haven’t change at all.”

“Of course not! I wouldn’t be the same loveable me if I changed.”

Sonic and I spent the rest of the night talking about little things. Eventually, he dozed off, and I just sat, watching the rain as it fell from the dark sky.

* * *

The morning came, and the rain finally dissipated. I spent the few hours watching the sun rise until Sonic awoke.

Yawning, he said to me, “I’m surprised you’re still here, Shadow…”

I shrugged. “The rain just let up.”

Stretching, the other got to his feet. “So what are you going to do now?”

We both walked out of the cave and into the warm sunlight. “I think I’m going to keep traveling,” I replied, looking out at the horizon.

Sonic nodded. “Cool. Hey, maybe we can travel together.” Then, he added in a teasing tone, “I could tell you a little more about your past…”

“Tempting…but no. This is something I must do by myself, for myself.”

With a smile, he nodded again. “I gotcha.” He held his hand out to me. “Take care of yourself, Shadow.”

I grasped his extended hand. “You too, Sonic.”

After our brief handshake, our hands dropped to our sides. With another grin, Sonic said, “Hey, maybe we’ll see each other again.”

I smirked. “If you can catch me,” I replied.

With a chuckle from him, we sped off in opposite directions. Only then did it register in my mind that I forgot to thank Sonic for everything…Well, if we do see each other again, which is most likely, I’ll thank him then.

I ran east, in the direction of the rising sun. I suppose I felt as though my sun would rise soon as well. I may be Shadow the Hedgehog, but where there’s shadow, there’s light. So someday, when my questions are answered, I’ll find the light I need to be Shadow.

So I’ll keep running, but not because I want to escape my questions. Not anymore. I thought, perhaps if I keep running, I’ll come across the answers I’m looking for.


End file.
